"Live today to it's fullest, for tomorrow may never come" Today is the 25th. it is the 5 month anniversary of the day i left rc. it has been a difficult day, for alot of reasons. i have been thinking of the past couple of years of my life and how much i miss what i had. i pray alot, i pray for strength to get through the challenges that come my way. i pray for guidence and direction. i pray for the health of myself and those i love, including those that i love but no longer love me. i ask myself how do i get past this? how do i stop the hurt? and the answer is, it will never stop. because i never forget. never forget things that happened and how i felt when those things were happening. sometimes i think it is a curse, to never forget, but i know that when i am old and look back on my whole life, i will be happy to remember everything that has happened to me. i also know that i have a chance to start life all over again. to do things right. i am never going to be rich, but i can have a rich life. i still miss her and i still love her and there is no sense in denying it. i have come to terms with where i am in my life now.