12:43 PM 11/12/03 well, this is the first entry on my blog sight in more than 3 months. lots has happened since then. tam told me a month ago that she no longer loves me and does not want to be married to me anymore. boy did that come out of the blue! i mean we had some disagreements about laura and what i expected from her. but by that time i had given up on getting my way and was just letting it go. i guess too late, huh? well anyways, i miss her but if that is what she wants, and since she won't talk to me at all about it, i guess that is what she wants, then we have to move on. i have my good days and my bad days, but concentrating on finding a job is keeping me focused. so far i have put in over 50 resumes and will keep doing so until i find something. i know it is a tough job market but i am also confident that i will find something. and if not in dfw then i will start sending by email and fax to other cities. i am no longer tied to dfw since i no longer have my house or my truck. i am free to go wherever i want to. was not what i wanted, but we don't always get what we want. i guess i will just try a little harder.