Why are we the way we are?....

"Do whatever it takes to be happy, for it is hard to know what life will bring you."Why are we the way we are? What makes us different from each other even when we are so much alike? I speak of this because I am trying to figure out how come no matter how hard I try to be angry with tammi for what she has done, I can’t. I just cannot be mad at her. I want to, but I can’t. It just is not in me to get mad at people. What comes across as anger is in reality hurt feelings. When one of our kids disses us, and I lash out, it comes out as anger, but that anger is covering up for my hurt feelings. I am angry at myself for allowing my feelings to get hurt by others. Because when you allow others to hurt you, they are in control of your life. I will stay in control of my life and my life only. I will not allow others to hurt me, and by not allowing others tohurt me, I will not be angry. And if I am not angry, I am happy. I love her and dearly want our marriage to continue and be stronger, but I will not allow myself to be hurt any longer. We all are in total and complete control of ourselves.