Updateing.....

So much to report and so little time. But things are going to get much better soon. I broke down (and got broke!!!) and bought a laptop. I got the Dell entry level Inspirion B120 but it should do what I need it to do. 40gb hd, 512 megs ram, cdrw-dvd combo drive. I think that will be enough for what I want. I want to be able to watch shows at the hospital that I have recorded on my dvr. That way Tam and I can share in it. I want to be able to surf the net when away from the house. My old laptops don't have a battery so I have to find an outlet. Also, they are just not powerful enough to watch video like what is on abc.com. I found a coffee shop very close to my work that has free wifi so I figure I will stop in a couple of nights (or mornings depending on the amount of patrons) a week. Just long enough to check email, read some news, maybe upload some pictures to yahoo (they partnered with Target and it worked wonderful) for printing. I have found since I lost my internet connection at home just how much time I was wasting goofing off. I now get a lot more of my chores done along with many more of my other hobbies and interets. That includes stuff on the computer, but not surfing. Editing photos or video or writing letters to doctors, hospitals, or my daughter. Or maybe just posting to my blog, haha! Tam was moved to a rehab hospital on Thursday. We don't know how long she will be there but once she is strong enough to put weight on her legs she will go back to Presby for surgery, at least most likely. She may not ever have surgery and just take antibiotics for the remainder of her life. Soon I am going to the doctor to be tested for bi-polar and diabeties. I am borderline diabetic and we are convinced I am bi-polar. I look at all the symptoms of my daughters diagnosis and compare them to my entire life and I fit perfectly. I wonder what it will be like to be "normal". What could I have become? Could I have done a better job teaching my daughter? Could I have avoided the pitfalls of my ex-wife (my son's mother)? I will never know and I cannot dwell on that which has already happened, I can only go forward. Speaking of my ex, she has been "not nice" again but I made a choice that I was not going to let negative people bring me down and I have had a really good coupld of days since. I don't know when I will get to post again but I do know once I get my new laptop I will be able to post a couple of times a week at the coffee shop, Americas Best Coffee, which is just a short hop from my work. I plan on moving close to work at the end of July so this will work out very well, I think. I really miss my wife, I want her home soon. It is hard but I perservere.