12.24.2004

What a slow day....

Work took forever! We were busy up until about 1pm and then it was dead the rest of the day. We were allowed to close at 6pm (Whoopee, one hour early!) and sure enough at 5pm someone came in for work on their car. A guy needed his remotes reprogrammed so at least we made a couple of bucks. I had some work I could have done but with it being Christmas eve no one was motivated to do anything at all. So I chatted, walked around, checked internet for the Cassini-Huygens probe seperation, chatted some more and along the way managed to book a few repair orders. But I did get in my 45 hours for the week so I am happy about that as I will get my regular check plus my holliday pay. I will use the holliday pay the next two weeks to get my savings going for Ryan's therapy. That will cost me anywheres from $550-$990 depending on how many sessions the therapist feels he needs for our reintroduction. Jess learned a tough lesson tonight. The red-hair dyed punk boy she had for a boyfriend called her up just to say "Merry Christmas Bitch". I want to beat his punk ass so bad, but I don't want to go to jail for busting up a 16yr old. She already has a new boyfriend and from what I gather, I will like him a whole lot better. But I have made sure she understands it isn't pierced earings or dyed hair, or even smoking that I am concerned with. It is drugs and respect. Drugs are bad, she has seen what they have done to her mother and I really odn't think that is going to be a problem. But respect, I have been really reinforcing to her he has to respect her and along with that me. Because disrespecting me would be disrespcting her also. I talked with my boss the other day about similiar situations and he told me a story. He married his wife at age 18, and the have been married 40+ years. He did not get along with his father in law, never did. But his father told him to never forget that the man is his wifes father and he is to show him respect for her. She is finally getting the message that there is a difference between likeing someone and respecting them. I was not very good at teaching this in the past and it cost me dearly. But I am learning from my mistakes, learning to use a different way to teach than I did in the past. I have learned what I feel was my biggest thing holding me back. My expectations for myself were very high and I expected others to meet my expectations. When they didn't I felt they let me down. I have learned better and now I do better. I am so much more at peace. I owe to the three P's. Prayer to God, Perserverence toward not giving up, and Priorities, getting them in proper order. Tomorrow is Christmas day, and to take a page from a friend, the past year has been quite a growth experience for me. I came back home with $200 in my pocket and a boat load of shattered dreams. In the ensuing weeks and months I found work with my old boss, created a budget that worked for me and has allowed me to not only pay bills early but save some too, bring my daughter home and celebrate this Christmas with a feeling I have not had in quite a while. I said a year ago when I had realized it had been seven years since my troubles had started that this was the end of the seven year of tribulation for me. This is a year of transition and it is going in such a positive direction. I am in such a good place and it is only going to get better. Faith in the Lord has really changed me and daily I read a bit of scripture in a continuing effort to right my ship. Dr. Phil said in his book "No matter how right you think you are, if it isn't working you must change" and I have done that and continue to do that. A year later and I feel I have emerged from a fog of ignorance to clear air.

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