It feels so good!!
"Do whatever it takes to be happy, for it is hard to know what life will bring you." To finally get a paycheck again. It has been a long time coming and I am happy to be working. I hope to retire to Rapid City or somewhere like that, but for now I will be working the next 15 years here. Not because this is where I want to be, but because it is where I can earn enough money to finish my life out the way I want to. Maybe I was meant to work for Nissan and be a booker, but if so, it is fine with me. I still have a dream, a goal for what I want out of my life, and after what I have endured the past 7 years, I will not let anything or anyone alter that goal now. I don't have the time left in my life to change course. The one thing I will touch on is how I never realized that when someone asked me to do something and I was just trying to give my opinion and debate whether the action was the best way or not, they were of the belief that because I was disagreeing with their method, that I was not going to do as they had asked. This was what happened when Tam told me about her diet the doctor had laid out before her. Well, until I had a similiar conversation with my mother the other day, I had never before seen it from the other persons point of view. Of course I was going to put the chips in the bag as mother had asked. I just thought it was not needed as closing the chip bag would be good enough. But it should not have mattered, I should have just done it rather than try to argue or debate the issue. Just as I should have not disagreed with Tam's diet, but rather just helped her. I never had any intention of not doing it as it was laid out before her, but now I know that not everyone takes the time to know who and how I am, and therefore would know that I fully support them and do for them, even if I disagree with what I am doing. I now know that is not always the case, and I cannot take it for granted that they will understand I am just "debating", and not truly serious about not doing as they ask and need me to do. I have learned to be more careful about what I say and how I say it. Ten days left until I order my camera. I cannot wait. It will be my last luxury purchase for 6 months, and then I will buy a new computer just before I move into my own apartment. Even though 6 months seems like a long time, it really isn't. Working and going on day trips to shoot pics will make the time go by fast. I have already been working for over a week, and it seems like I just started. I truly believe that 2004 will be a wonderful year for me. I am going to stay positive, only deal with whatever is right on front of me, and continue to practice good communication skills. I deal very heavily with customers on a daily basis, so if I can communicate with them, surely I can learn to communicate with family and friends also. There is much work yet to be done, but things are starting to work themselves out.