"To err is human, to forgive is divine"

"Do whatever it takes to be happy, for it is hard to know what life will bring you." I have joined a few discussion groups that are about hearbreak and the pain that comes with it, and one guy just posted that saying in a response to someone else going through this also. And it is such a good saying. I want her to forgive me for being blind to what truly was going on, just as I have forgiven her for doing this. If she had not done this, then I could not have grown, but for once I don't want to have "personal growth" at the expense of being with the one I love. I want that 2nd chance, the opportunity to take what i have learned and apply it with the one I learned it from. Yes, to learn, to grow will help me in how I go through my life, but does it always have to be done with the thought "I will use this in future relationships". Why can't it be used with this relationship, to make this one better. For as long as I live, I will hope that there will be chance to make it work with her, and not with another. There was so much that was right about this relationship, how we were made for each other to not let it go now. Tam, if you ever read this, I did learn, I am growing, and I want you to know I am not Alton, or Joe, or Marty, or whoever you may be with right now, I am me and I do work towards growth and betterment. We had so many good times together, everything was about doing things together, and I will keep my promise to you to learn. A relationship, a marriage is not a simple thing, it is very complicated and it takes work, never ending work, to succeed. We should not run from this chance at growing old with someone that we truly enjoyed sharing time with. From our picnics, to rubbing shoulders, to just picking each other up from work, it was always about togetherness, and I know in my heart we can have that again. You just have to believe, have faith, and take that chance. Just as you had been hurt in your previous relationships, I had too had been hurt, but I took the chance with you, and I want you to return that faith in me. I hurt you because I had misguieded ideals and expectations. I see now what I could not see even as I was leaving RC, but I do see now, time away has allowed me to really focus on the real issue.

No comments: